An All-American Moron

There are idiots in this world, and then there are total morons:


The man who added more than a soupcon of embarrassment to the presidential election, and probably did as much as Sarah Palin to wreck John McCain’s chances, still seems hellbent on making an utter fool of himself, this time in Israel.

Samuel Wurzelbacher, otherwise known as “Joe the Plumber”, has arrived in Sderot, a town in northern Israel that’s received more than its fair share of Palestinian rockets over the years. He’s now working as a reporter for some way-out TV network no-one’s ever heard of.

Wurzelbacher’s first observation on arriving in Sderot was that he had “rarely seen such suffering”.

“The people of Sderot can’t do normal things day to day, like get soap in their eyes in the shower, for fear a rocket might come in. I’m sure they’re taking quick showers. I know I would.”

Presumably, use of the word “rarely” means he has seen such suffering before? Back in Toledo, Ohio, perhaps?

I have some advice for Joe the Plumber: take a trip to Gaza City. They have no showers there. In fact, they have no water at all, or food, or power. Instead they have plenty of mortars, missiles, white phosphorus bombs, tank shells. They’re so plentiful they drop out of the sky continuously – far more than the rockets that fall on Sderot.

No-one wants to live under the threat of death from the sky, be it Israelis in Sderot, or Palestinians in Gaza, and it’s not Wurzelbacher’s fault that he’s a total moron. It’s truly not his fault. He was indoctrinated into believing all the guff poured out by successive American governments, taught for years in American schools, and spewed forth ad infinitum by the media mouthpiece.

If you’re an averagely-intelligent being, capable of thinking for yourself, the chances are you’ll reach an age where such indoctrination is analyzed and rejected. With total morons that never happens. They just keep on swallowing the same old same old until the day they die.

Has Joe the Plumber ever asked himself why the Palestinians keep firing primitive rockets at Israel, when they know the retribution will be mighty? Has he ever bothered to learn of the hardships imposed on the Palestinians, over many years, by successive heartless and vindictive Israeli governments? Does he know the Gaza Strip is a worthless piece of land twenty-five miles long by seven wide, surrounded by barbed wire on three sides, and the sea on the fourth? Is he aware that everything needed to sustain life has to be trucked in from outside, and the outside is Israel, the check-points are Israeli, the decision whether to let one and a half million inhabitants live or die, is an Israeli decision?

Does Joe the Plumber even care that for three weeks the Israeli military has been bombarding what is in reality a huge refugee camp, where every square mile houses, on average, 8,500 people. Over one third of them are children. In reality, of course, the main centers are much more densely populated, as much of the Strip is scrub and desert.

Joe the Plumber knows none of these things. If he did, he probably wouldn’t care. Joe the Plumber’s a team man. He’s decided which team he’s going to support and nothing, nothing, will ever cause him to alter his allegiance.

In his own words:

“When someone hits me, I’m going to unload on the boy. And if the rest of the world doesn’t understand that, then I’m sorry.”[1]

Israel is Joe the Plumber’s team. He’s going to ensure the world knows he’s their greatest fan.

Samuel Wurzelbacher takes the prize, as an all-American, total and utter, moron.

“Joe the Plumber berates Israeli press for not being patriotic enough” Guardian, January 12th 2009

2 Replies to “An All-American Moron”

  1. When I heard he was being sent there, I thought this has to be a Jon Stewart type of joke. I couldn’t believe it. The man is a ginormous joke. Trouble is, there are many who truly believe “he is telling it like it is, go Joe”.
    Never underestimate the stupidity of the American people.

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