Last night’s NBC Nightly News, in the form of their “man in Baghdad” Brian Williams, struggled valiantly yet again to portray an imminent American victory in the country. Not easy, amid the IED’s, mortars, and small arms fire ever present in the background.
Brian did his best, even hand-selecting a small group of patriotic marines prepared to say on camera that they really wanted to “stay and finish the job”. Though one did finally admit she was off home on Thursday – even though she’d much rather remain in Baghdad.
The camera shot exposing five hundred and seventy-two uniformed arms desperately waving in the background to the cries of, “Let her stay – I’ll go in her place!” was, of course, edited out of the final cut.
There is sad news to report concerning a brand new segment only begun this week, but now looking like it may have to be axed altogether. Although no mention was made of it in last night’s bulletin, “What It Takes To Be Happy” seems to have vanished from our screens. After a promising start on Monday, Tuesday’s offering could only resort to a bunch of nuns enjoying a “Happy Moment”, and unfortunately last night’s was slashed altogether.
It seems there’s not enough happy people in America to keep the segment running. I wonder why not?
Instead of the “Happy Moment”, a swift look at the credit card companies ensued – not a pretty sight – with Congress getting upset that they were charging us too much interest.
Have they only just noticed?
On their side, the companies concerned say they have a right to charge excessively, as they tell their customers in advance. NBC took this “small print” to Harvard Business School to be interpreted, but none of the students there could understand it, which is hardly surprising given that HBS was where George W Bush passed his exams.
While hardly making up for the loss of the “Happy Moment”, this was at least an issue that all but the wealthiest Americans could agree with, and hug over.
A quick visit to the land of the Hualapai Indian tribe was next on NBC’s agenda. The tribe have decided to make some money from building a monstrous, horseshoe-shaped, walkway out over the Grand Canyon. Certain Colorado citizens are up in arms over the issue, describing it as an environmental eyesore. The Hualapai are dog-poor. Among the tribe unemployment runs at 50%. How they got the money to build this thing is a mystery, and it begs the question: are they being ripped off again Abram’s style?
It’s good that the Hualapai are using their initiative to improve their lot in life, but rather a pity that they were allowed to sink to such abject poverty in the first place, given they were the first ones to ever inhabit this land of the American Dream.
Brian Williams managed to dodge the bullets long enough for a final segment from Iraq before the program concluded, and spent a few moments explaining how the Humvee had improved since first they drove triumphantly into Baghdad in 2003.
It seems the lads have been busy in their spare time, reinforcing the armor plate, adding a protective gun-turret, and generally making the Humvee a bit safer than the tinplate version that cost so many American lives during the first three years of the war.
Which is definitely a good thing. Although, rather like the Hualapai tribe of Colorado, it’s a great pity they were allowed to remain so poor for so long.
Filed under: Comic book journalism