Among Those Souvenirs

The upcoming wedding of the UK’s Prince William and Kate Middleton is not only a chance for Brits to let their hair down and party, it’s also a wonderful business opportunity for entrepreneurs with sufficient flair to make a quick buck out of the occasion.

There will, of course, be the usual array of royal mugs, royal tea sets, royal coffee pots, and similar items on sale throughout the land. One particular commodity caught my eye, which some may perhaps consider less appropriate to the occasion.

Yes, it’s a pack of ‘Royal Condoms’, appropriately labelled, “Crown Jewels – a triumvirate of regal prophylactics.”

One would surely assume the younger royals were a little more into contraception than reliance on the old rubber overcoat. It’s to be hoped our Kate doesn’t have to lie patiently on the royal honeymoon bed waiting for her prince as he fumbles vainly in the darkness, trying to open the packet.

At five pounds for a pack of three ($7.55) these souvenirs(?) are certainly priced for the wealthier customer. A few moments web research unearths a dozen pack of similar items for a mere three pounds eighty seven ($5.99).

Still, it’s not everyday there’s a royal wedding, so why not splash out on something a bit special?

A word of warning, though. These products do carry a disclaimer:

Crown Jewels Royal Wedding Souvenir Condoms are a novelty condom not suitable for contraception or protection against STDs”[1]

So, in fact, they’re eminently suited to the British royals – they’re overly-expensive and they don’t work.

[1] “Crown Jewels Condoms of Distinction”

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