The Night Before Christmas

Despite the vivid imaginings of thousands, the Mayan calendar failed to predict the end of the world on December 21st. Hopefully, I can now safely wish all friends and readers of Sparrow Chat a very merry Christmas.

Whether Muslim or Jew, Christian or Atheist, Hindu or Buddhist, or none of those things, may you revel in the sentiments of the season, even as we languish in the vain hope that all may be more tolerant of each other in 2013, than they were in 2012.

And, let’s not forget, though the world failed to extinguish itself on the 21st, it could still happen sometime in the (not too distant?) future…

T’was the night before Christmas, and all round the earth
Terrorists plotted for all they were worth.
Obama sat musing which drone strike to pick,
A wedding? A market? Whose ass should he kick?

Muslims seethed hatred for all that was Christian,
Jews in Israel eyed Hamas with suspicion.
Syrian rebels joined force ‘gainst Assad,
They’ll soon fight each other – the whole world’s gone mad.The Arctic was melting, the earth growing warm,
Droughts, floods, tornadoes, becoming the norm.
Nobody took notice, “It’s not us!” they cried
As New York washed away on a rather high tide.

High in the Heavens Mohammed and Jesus
Mithras, Athena, and Zeus with his aegis,
Looked down on the world they had brought into being
And couldn’t believe what the hell they were seeing.

They spoke not a word, but went straight to their work,
Called all the angels, then turned with a jerk,
And blasting the earth with a fire from their noses
Consumed it all up, despite firemen’s hoses.

Then summoning chariots of fire with a whistle
They flew off to heaven like the down of a thistle.
Only one of them spoke – the one they called Mithras,
Muttered, “Bloody little shits! They just don’t deserve Christmas.”

(With apologies to Clement Clarke Moore)


4 Replies to “The Night Before Christmas”

  1. Backatcha, RJA with bells on and buttons down the middle (as my people say!).

    With one wish – that your writer’s cap appears far more frequently in 2013.


  2. Warm good wishes for what’s left of “The Holiday Season”, RJ.

    Excellent parody of that famous poem, too RJ. That’s a poem noir if ever I saw one! 😉

  3. WWW – I’ll certainly attempt to make your wish come true. I just need an extra twelve hours in every day!

    Mary – and to you, also.

    Twilight – all the very best for 2013.

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