Constipation, Perhaps?

Way back in March of this year, in a small town in Kansas, it was discovered that a woman had been sitting on her boyfriend’s toilet seat for two years, without ever getting off.[1] I mention it because it’s a story I’ve only just noticed, and while reading the facts one thought that recurred was, “Did the boyfriend have his legs crossed all that time.”

It’s difficult to find much in the news that’s worthy of comment these days. Perhaps one of the most obvious titbits has been the New Yorker’s cover cartoon of the Obamas, with its resultant public and media furore, but even that is hardly worthy of serious discussion.

Was the New Yorker right to publish? Yes. Was it in bad taste? Well, that would depend on your taste.

Perhaps the greatest indictment should not be of the New Yorker, but of ourselves, for taking it and twisting it into a political event. After all, this nation is supposed to be all about freedoms, but whenever anyone exercises those freedoms it seems the whole nation is consumed by wrath and indignation.

There’s an equal outpouring of disagreement over the International Criminal Court’s decision to charge Sudan’s dictator president, Omar al-Bashir, with genocide. While most sane people don’t argue his guilt – Bashir’s government makes the Saddam Hussein regime look like followers of Mother Theresa – the contretemps is over the timing, and whether Sudanese repercussions might endanger UN peacekeepers.

Perhaps the UN should have considered that back in 2005 when it originally referred the matter to the ICC? Since when has justice been something to be deferred until more convenient?

Still, we can rely on the great U.S of A. to swing its political muscle behind the ICC. Oh…. no, we can’t. George W Bush and his merry band refuse to recognize international justice – unless it’s dispatched from the bomb bay of an A10, of course.

I think we’ve all had enough of this economy business. It’s time to turn it off and get back to normal. After all, it isn’t real. Phil Gramm said so, and he should know, he’s a senator. We’re all just whining over nothing. So what if gas is over four dollars, Fanny Mae refuses you that loan for a Big Mac, and cows have set up their own Milk Marketing Board to cut out the middlemen?

There’s one positive note to the economic downturn: we’ve all learned not to blame anyone. No-one’s pointing a finger. It’s true the FBI are feeling the collars of a few small-fry businessmen for shady practices, but in the true spirit of pulling together for the good of all, no-one in America is asking, “Who’s responsible?”

Perhaps the reason no-one’s asking is because the answer is so obvious. All you have to do is look back at the figures. In March 2002, the economy was doing fine. Oil was under $23 a barrel[2]. Then, in early 2003, something happened that caused the price to jump by ten dollars a barrel. Over the next few years it climbed steadily as the dollar weakened against international currencies, driving the price of oil higher and higher.

Now, let me see, what did happen in early 2003……….. nope, blowed if I can remember……

Finally, the best news item of the week for me – and one that provides a (very) weak and tenuous hook to my leader paragraph – was last Tuesday’s BBC report claiming that the ‘Presidential Memorial Committee of San Francisco’ was preparing to honor President George W Bush on his retirement from office, by naming a sewage works after him.[3]

Committee organizer Brian McConnell said:

“It’s important to remember our leaders in the right historical context.”

Occasionally, you read something that just makes you feel better.

[1] “Woman sits on boyfriend’s toilet for 2 years” MSNBC, March 12th 2008

[2] “Historical Crude Oil Prices (Table)”

[3] “Group seeks Bush sewage ‘tribute'” BBC, July 8th 2008

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4 Replies to “Constipation, Perhaps?”

  1. I agree with AlDeVito – a sewage plant actually does some good, what did GWB ever do that could be even loosely labelled “good”?

    That New Yorker cartoon cover was a breath of fresh air. It’s past time that Obama came in for some joshing. American comedians are like a lot of big girls’ blouses, afraid to target him in case they are called racist. Politicians, of whatever colour, are fair game – and should be shot at (figuratively, of course).

  2. I thought it a brilliant cartoon, RJA, is satire dead in America, oh yeah, silly me, I forgot. And the smirking chimp-o-pants himself says the economy is doing really well, so get on with it and quitcherbitchin’.
    All is well in Kansas.

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