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Never Mind The Quantity – Save The Rich!

Hey! Are you an American? Do you know you should be ashamed of yourself? Why aren’t you out there, buy, buy, buying – as though your very life depended on it?

How dare you “look twice at things before buying”. Do you realize you’re not being as frivolous as you were?

George W Bush understands. Only today he said:

“The sooner you get an IRA check, the more likely you are to spend it.”

Well, in truth, what he really said was that “the sooner you get a check, the more likely it is the stimulus package will kick in and make a difference,” but it means the same thing.

American consumers, let’s be brutally frank, the recession is all your fault. You stopped spending, and that’s why the economy has crashed.

Are you not totally ashamed of yourselves? Don’t you realize that because of you all those nice, kindly, bankers who sold you those sub-prime mortgages, are now having to accept hand-outs of your money from the US treasury?

How can you sleep at night?

The future of the nation’s economy is in your hands, Get out there and spend. Never mind that your credit cards are maxed; never mind that there’s no food in the cupboard. Raid your granny’s piggy bank; dig into the kids’ college fund; do whatever it takes to get more greenbacks, but for God’s sake get out and spend, spend, spend!

Don’t be so bloody selfish. It’s not just you who are suffering, you know.

It’s all those nice, rich people, as well.[1]

[1] NBC Nightly – “Are Americans Shopped Out?”

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Here, Boy – Good Boy!

Have you noticed how the Republican presidential nominee, John McCain, has got himself a puppy?

It’s strange, because it’s the same puppy Al Gore selected as his VP in the 2000 election.

How can this be, I hear you ask?

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It’s really quite simple. John McCain, mind changer par excellence, needs a similar personage in the form of Joe Lieberman to balance his insecurities.

When McCain blithely extolled the alliance between Iran and al Qaeda recently, it was dear old Joe who whispered in his lug’ole that actually the Iranians were Shia, and al Qaeda one hundred percent Sunni – and never, as they say, the twain shall meet.

Joe Lieberman is a Jew. With a name like that he could hardly be anything else. No great surprise then that he accompanied McCain on a recent visit to Israel.

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John McCain isn’t a Jew, though you’d hardly know it from this photograph.

From Israel, McCain headed for the 51st State of the Union and a visit with the governor prime minister, Gordon Brown.

Guess who’s tagging along behind? Oh, no, surely not? Is that really Joseph Lieberman standing beside Gordon?

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I do believe it is.

Joe Lieberman was a powerful member of the Democratic party until 2006, when he was beaten in the Connecticut Democratic primary by Ned Lamont. He then went “independent”, which broadly speaking meant he sat on the fence and waited for offers.

Now, it seems, he’s finally got one.

Of course, if that means he’s offered the VP nomination by McCain, he’ll have to jump off the fence and into the opposing camp, but that shouldn’t prove to much of a problem for Lieberman, and having two “bouncy-bouncies” on the Republican ticket will certainly assist the elderly McCain to decide which side of the fence he should really sit on.

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