Month: December 2007

The phrase, “War on Christmas”, has reared its ugly head once more. Frankly, it’s boring, repetitive, and hardly in the spirit of goodwill to all men, which, whatever one’s religious bent, is a damned good spirit to hang onto, even if only for a few days during this particularly dark and dreary time of year.

The whole world knows how Americans love a good argument. Nothing is “middle-of-the-road” in this country. It’s a land of extreme views and opinions, all with just one common element – the ability to tear this nation asunder.

Christmas, it would seem, is no exception.

Throughout the land, the debate rages. Should it be called a Christmas tree, or a Holiday tree? Is it right to have a floodlit crib and manger above the entrance to local town council offices? Do children open Santa’s gifts on Christmas morning or Holiday morning?

The country where I was born and raised is a secular nation, yet no-one argues over the naming of holidays. Christmas is Christmas; Easter is Easter, and Pentecost is Whitsun.

You see, America, you don’t have deed and title to Christmas, it’s an international tradition celebrated throughout the world. It matters not if you are Christian, Pagan, or Atheist; Christmas is Christmas. It has been for donkey’s years, and it always will be. So stop arguing about it, and for Christ’s sake just enjoy it!

Neither is Christmas the sole preserve of Christians. Just because they stuck their deity’s name on the front of it doesn’t mean we can’t all celebrate. After all, in America, George Washington’s birthday is a celebrated federal holiday, but while he may have been a cool dude, he was definitely not a god. Most of us who wisely decline to behave in a weird and illogical manner towards Jesus of Nazareth, still consider he was a cool dude.

We’re all aware that the ‘Christ” bit relates to the Christian god, but the festival covers a multitude of other deities, including the Sun, and over the years they’ve all fallen under the general umbrella of Christmas, because the early Christians pinched the date from pagan sources somewhere around the 11th century.

But we pagans don’t object to that. We don’t rise up and insist it is renamed “Sol Invictus mass”, or, “Mithrasmass”, or, “Ishtarmass”. And if we don’t argue about it, America, why should you?

If you truly want to fight and bicker over the names of holidays, why not stick with one of your own, like Thanksgiving. No-one in the US of A rises up in indignation over that name, now do they? Personally, I think it’s a very silly name and hardly in keeping with a nation supposedly secular and tolerant of beliefs. After all, who is an Atheist supposed to give thanks to?

Perhaps it’s time Thanksgiving was renamed. Here’s a suggestion. How about, “Let’s-invite-a-whole-load-of-relatives-around-we-don’t-really-want-to-see -and-stuff-ourselves-so-full-of-food-we-fall-off-our-chairs Day”?

Or, if that’s too long to trip off the tongue, try: “ThanksForWhat? Day” as most Americans I’ve approached on the subject haven’t the faintest idea what they’re actually giving thanks for.

So get the message, America: hands off Christmas. It doesn’t belong to you. You didn’t invent it.

It actually existed long before you did, which means you have less right than the rest of the world to interfere with it.

A VERY HAPPY CHRISTMAS TO ONE AND ALL.

Filed under: Christmas cheer

Whose idea was it to run presidential political nominations over the Christmas holidays? Isn’t it supposed to be a time of “Goodwill to all Men”, and “Peace on Earth”?

How can that be when every news broadcast throughout the nation carries footage of the dross they’ve dredged up as presidential-hopefuls, and paraded like some old has-been’s Ugly Parade, with the grand prize – to live four years in an overly-large mansion and f**k-up even more of the world?

As an observer of American politics these five years – and one with no affiliated axe to grind – the whole concept of party nominations just leaves a nasty taste in the mouth.

It’s nothing more than an ego competition. Those with the least controlling egos are rapidly relegated to the back rows, leaving grossly swollen-headed egomaniacs, with equally inflated bank accounts, vying for the prime position.

You don’t have to be an alien sitting on the moon with a spyglass to work out that the only candidate with any degree of honesty and integrity probably only has it because he’s still politically wet behind the ears.

Yet, out of the top three from each party, he is undoubtedly the finest choice – for exactly that reason.

Why is that the case? Because a lifetime of experience in politics anywhere, except perhaps a banana republic, should produce Statesmen of quality, integrity, and honor.

There is not one Statesman (or woman) among the topmost runners for the presidential nomination; not one iota of statesmanlike quality, neither integrity nor honor, emanates from any one of them. Each is blatantly concerned only with their own success, showing only ‘cupboard love’ for those needed to raise them into power, to be tossed aside as garbage once the counts are finally in, in November 2008.

The prime candidates are already well out of the race. Those who show even a modicum of sensitivity, humanity, and common sense have all fallen, or been pushed over, at the first fence. There is no room in American politics for such as they. God forbid a president should be chosen who refused to bomb Iran for wanting what America has had for sixty years – the ability to run its own nuclear power stations without reliance on outside sources. God forbid the next president should offer the helping hand of friendship to other nations, rather than phosphorus bombs and exploding bullets. God forbid the next president might insist on abiding by the Geneva Conventions, rather than secret CIA prisons and waterboarding.

Don’t be alarmed, America. God will forbid it.

The next President of the United States will continue to utilize phosphorus bombs and exploding bullets. He, or she, will ignore the Geneva Conventions when it suits, and those secret prisons will remain for when waterboarding is deemed necessary.

There will, however, be a noticeable difference between the present incumbent and the next one. Such matters will be dealt with less blatantly, virtually without public knowledge; just as they were before George W Bush took over the reins in 2000.

America will feel better. What the eye doesn’t see, and the ear doesn’t hear, the hearts will not grieve over.

Peace on Earth and Goodwill to all Men?

Not a snowball’s chance in Hell.

God will forbid it.

Filed under: Death of democracy

It’s not often Sparrow Chat has much to say that is good about the United States of America. While many of its people are warm-hearted, caring individuals, the nation as a whole has developed a plethora of undesirable habits, and shown a capability for inhumane behavior that stretches back way beyond the vagaries of the present Administration.

Just occasionally, however, instead of continually slipping backwards down the tall, steep, ladder that does eventually lead up to the far-distant objective known as “Civilization”, America manages to make one fumbling step in the right direction, raising hopes that one day – probably far distant – it may just make it all the way to the top.

Today, America – or, at least, that bit of it known as New Jersey – took one of those fumbling steps.

Congratulations to the State of New Jersey.

Today, the State of New Jersey joined North Dakota, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Iowa, Michigan, West Virginia, Massachusetts, Maine, Vermont, Rhode Island, Hawaii and Alaska, as another state to have finally evolved out of the slime of legalized murder, and onto the verdant shores of “Humanityville”.

Nevertheless, any sense of finality should be tempered with a degree of caution. Flip-flopping over the death penalty, often at the whim of current governors, has become something of a pastime in America over the years.

Oddly, those who cry out most vehemently against abolition are the Christian far-right. Only this evening a New Jersey resident, when asked for his opinion, vigorously stated his support for capital punishment by announcing that he followed the Bible teaching, “Do unto others…..”. Fortunately, he failed to finish the quotation, thus saving himself from the embarrassment of looking totally stupid in front of three million NBC News viewers.

The question on everyone’s lips, then: will the rest of America follow New Jersey’s lead?

It’s highly unlikely.

Take the State of Texas as a prime example. The good people of Texas have much in common with the French revolutionaries when it comes to executions, though state law prevents public access, so the good ladies of Texas are denied the privilege of sitting knitting in the execution chamber – at least, at the time this article goes to press.

Texans are so imbued with the idea of capital punishment it probably ranks as the number one most effective means of population control in the state, outdoing chastity belts and religious abstinence. Abolition would remove four-fifths of Texans’ conversation, leaving only the price of beef and whether George W Bush should eventually be canonized.

So, while some states may follow in the footsteps of New Jersey, it’ll likely be a cold day in Hell before Texas gives up its all-time favorite hobby.

Filed under: Death row tears