Who’s First For The Funny Farm – May Or Trump?

Well, you didn’t want to see yet another image of ugly old Theresa May, did you? So, instead, here’s a picture of a NICE girl.

Three terrorist attacks in three months have proved a breaking point for Theresa May, Britain’s prime minister. How dare they create chaos and mayhem during HER election campaign. “Enough is enough!” she exclaimed this morning, after chairing a meeting of the fabulously ineffective COBRA committee – the third emergency meeting in three months, each one following a terrorist attack, when they meet to discuss how best to appear to be taking action while actually taking none at all. [1]

Suffice to say May’s ejaculation was sufficient to send hundreds of British jihadists scurrying to the ports and airports, hellbent on escaping the country before she can vent her wrath further upon them. No? Well, perhaps not?

Not content with enough being enough, May then attacked the internet companies for allowing these jihadist swine to communicate with each other so easily, totally ignoring how the IRA managed to communicate quite well using a technological device known in those bygone days as a ‘telephone’.

Next from May came the predicted, “….we need tougher prison sentences…” One can only assume she intends to stack the terrorist’s corpses in a prison freezer, given that none of the attackers survived from any of the three incidents. Someone should really inform her the whole purpose of these jihadists is to die at the scene of their carnage, otherwise they’ll never be able to claim their seventy-odd virgins, and instead have to bow to Satan’s crooked finger. Perhaps, if the police weren’t quite so quick to kill them, they could spend the rest of their lives in jail, thus having ample time to rue their lost virgins and face a bleak eternity being slow-roasted by Old Nick?

That would probably prove an even greater deterrent than Theresa May’s, “Enough is enough!”

Meanwhile, across the pond, the White House’s latest occupant seems on the verge of total madness. It’s really not difficult to picture Donald Trump being led away, straitjacketed, by men in white coats while he alternates between mumbling, “Covafefe rules; I love Covafefe; give me more Covafefe…” and repeated phrases of, “Make America Great Again,” sung inharmoniously to the tune of the “Star Spangled Banner.”

No, this is not Donald Trump as a kid, this is a NICE boy

It’s been going wrong for some time – well, quite a long time, actually – but the final straw was that darned Paris Climate Agreement. What was he supposed to do? He only told that story to a bunch of ne’er-do-wells – you know, the one about China spreading the rumour – to get them to vote for him. Then, once he was made president Ivanka told him it was all true and climate change was actually happening. What WAS he supposed to do? He’d lose credibility if he admitted he’d been wrong. He might have to publicly apologise to China. No, that would never do. He’d just pull the plug on the Paris agreement and that would be that. But now, that idiot U.N. Ambassador Nicki Hayley has gone and told everyone the truth…and the Wall Street Journal’s printed it! [2]

“Make America Great Again…la,la,la…Make America Great Again…la,la,la…I love Covafefe…”.

One final look back at the front door of the White House, the newly-inaugurated President Pence grinning broadly as he waves him goodbye, and it’s, “Come on now, Mister Trump, jump into the van and we’ll soon have you settled in your new home.”

[1] “Theresa May says ‘enough is enough’ after seven killed in London Bridge attack” Guardian, June 4th 2017

[2] “Trump Believes Climate Change Is Real, U.N. Ambassador Nikki Haley Says” WSJ, June 3rd 2017

2 Replies to “Who’s First For The Funny Farm – May Or Trump?”

  1. Oh I think Trump will win this bet! May is a Conservative pain in the butt, but not a rare Tweeting Loon such as we have on this side of t’Pond.

    I listened to Trump’s speech on the Paris Accord, beginning to end, and as it happened. To be honest, I didn’t think it was too bad – if, and it was a big if, the figures and stuff he quoted were actually correct and factual.

    Paris Accord hadn’t done much so far anyway, except by looking good to onlookers. Obama didn’t have it ratified anyway, because congress wouldn’t have upheld it , I guess. I believe Obama did it only to look good for his “legacy”.

    This current thing reminds me of the USA’s Kyoto refusal way back when. Now THAT really pissed me off. If countries, and the US in particular, had done more back then, and made it binding, we’d be in a much better situation re climate change. But no, they’d rather fight and kill brown-skinned people abroad, putting more carbon into the atmosphere than ordinary people could possibly imagine – the military is said to be the worst offender, re affecting climate change by far!

    Maybe it’ll be the citizens who’ll be first to the Funny Farms, RJ!

    By the way – love your new look on the blog!

  2. Twilight – Not so sure Trump will be first, after the UK election result. May is decidedly rattled. Re: the Paris Accord, Trump did get the figures wrong – virtually all of them. He’s very good at that!
    Yes, you’re right, the military’s way more important than the planet.
    Thanks for the compliment on the blog. It’s a work in progress, but I decided a new image was necessary. I rather like my blue ‘sparrows’! 😉

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